


palermo created a group chat

by drqco



Category: La casa de papel | Money Heist (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Crack, F/F, F/M, Fluff, M/M, chat fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:20:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24087256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drqco/pseuds/drqco
Summary: in which they're all in high school, have a group chat, and don't know how to act.
Relationships: Berlin | Andrés de Fonollosa/Palermo | Martín Berrote, Bogotá/Nairobi | Ágata Jiménez, Denver | Daniel Ramos/Rio | Aníbal Cortés, Raquel Murillo/Alicia Sierra
Comments: 50
Kudos: 271





	1. our introduction (the gays)

**Author's Note:**

> this is so self indulgent tbh NJSDSJDJKS 
> 
> im going to be adding pairings as we go and i might add more characters as well (really only alicia), i honestly don't know where this fic is going but i'll update it periodically i guess as i work on other stuff !!

palermo created _the gays_

palermo: good morning everyone im having a crisis please help 

nairobi: palermo. it is. 4 in the morning go back to SLEEP 

palermo: IM HAVING A CRISIS CANT YOU READ 

tokyo: im going to MURDER YOU PALERMO I WAS SLEEPING

palermo: NOT MY FAULT IM HAVING A CRISIS AND U GUYS CANT MUTE UR PHONE 

rio: whats happening?

denver: PALERMO I HATE YOU 

bogota: ive been awake 

marseille: Me, as well. 

helsinki: hi everyone! hi nairobi :) 

nairobi: hi helsi :) 

nairobi: is everyone awake who r we missing 

lisbon: sadly im awake 

sergio: WHERES MY BROTHER MARTIN BERROTE

nairobi: real names? ur fucked palermo 

palermo: OK OK THATS THE PROBLEM

tokyo: BERLIN’S GONE MISSING? 

nairobi: WOW IVE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY IN MY LIFE IM CRYING 

palermo: no thats not the problem

palermo: he’s sleeping next to me 

rio: yes, palermo, like normal people do and what normal people should be doing right now 

denver: wheres the problem palermo i would literally give anything to be with my girlfriend right now 

stockholm: :((( love you 

denver: LOVE YOU TOO 

palermo: forgot straight people existed 💔 

nairobi: thats 

nairobi: thats honestly the only funny thing you’ve ever said 

palermo: ur not straight …….? um

nairobi: im bi 

palermo: oh cool dont see the appeal of Girls but ok 

tokyo: im beating ur ass the next moment i see u palermo just shut up it’s not that hard

bogota: girls >>>>

tokyo: i love you bogota 

palermo: OK I DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT GIRLS R GREAT I LOVE YOU ALL BUT d word >>>>>

manila: yeah actually 

palermo: okay the only straight person that has rights is manila 

denver: trans rights 

manila: love you primo 

denver: love you more prima 

palermo: brb im going 2 the bathroom but im taking my phone

nairobi: YOU LITERALLY DID NOT HAVE TO SAY THAT WE WOULDN’T HAVE NOTICED 

nairobi: hate boys hate men 

palermo: thought u were bi

nairobi: i am but i still hate man 

bogota: :( 

helsinki: mean

nairobi: OK ONLY BOGOTA AND HELSINKI HAVE RIGHTS

rio: wait im confused whys this chat named the gays when theres only 2 ppl who r gay in this chat 

palermo: well a majority of the ppl here like the same gender as well and i dont want to change it 

palermo: kinda homophobic rio 💔

rio: HOW IS THAT 

sergio: palermo we’ve gone over this 

sergio: not every minor inconvenience for you is homophobia 

tokyo: WHAT’S THE POINT OF THIS CHAT UH 

palermo: shut up sergio ur straight 

nairobi: stop thats actually funny i hate this why are you suddenly being funny 

berlin: can confirm that my brother’s straight as a stick, martín offered to blow him two weeks before we started dating and his face was priceless. 

nairobi: SHUT THE FUCK UP I DIDNT NEED TO HEAR THAT MY GOD

rio: IM LITERALLY THROWING UP I DIDNT NEED TO HEAR THAT AT 4 IN THE MORNING 

tokyo: this is all a dream right i never read that sentence right tell me im right please 

sergio: ANDRÉS PLEASE STOP TALKING YOU ARENT NEEDED 

palermo: can confirm it’s true but im not even going to lie the thought of giving head to sergio scares me 

denver: PLEASE PLEASE STOP TALKING ABOUT THAT PLEASE PALERMO PLEASE

berlin: i mean, that’s what happened. 

palermo: GO BACK TO SLEEP ANDRÉS PLEASE 

berlin: where are you? i thought you were sleeping. 

palermo: went to the bathroom but im getting milk from the fridge rn ill be back there soon just sleep pls 

berlin: ok. 

bogota: honestly the way berlin types scares me 

denver: as if marseille’s doesn’t scare u 

marseille: Hm? How’s it scary? 

lisbon: it’s proper capitalization and spelling 

marseille: I mean, I assume you guys read proper books. How is it not scary then? 

denver: bold of u to assume i read 

tokyo: cause theyre like……. books marseille. when im texting i dont wanna read a novel or sound like a book yknow 

rio: ^^^^^^^^ 

tokyo: btw where’s moscow denver

denver: sleeping i think, old man 

rio: hes only a year older than us 

bogota: marseille and i are in the same grade as him 

marseille: I don’t know, Bogota. We do seem kind of old. 

bogota: i think it’s our minds 

nairobi: great n all u guys but whats the point of this chat again

tokyo: did palermo just. disappear 

stockholm: i wish 

lisbon: hopefully 

palermo: fuck you all homophobia at its finest 

nairobi: what happened and please tell us the point of this chat i kinda wanna sleep now 

palermo: got caught up drinking milk 

palermo: why is milk so good i could inhale that shit with my nose 

palermo: milk is the only reason im alive right now dont think i could survive without it 

rio: JUST TELL US THE POINT OF THIS CHAT 

palermo: IM HAVING A CRISIS I DONT KNOW WHAT TO GET BERLIN FOR VALENTINES 

tokyo: are you fucking kidding me palermo 

nairobi: PALERMO WHY

helsinki: valentines is a whole 2 weeks away amigo 

rio: this is a whole joke im going to sleep GOOD NIGHT 

tokyo: night baby 

stockholm: thinking about ripping palermo’s head off who wants to join me say i 

lisbon: i 

manila: i 

nairobi: i 

tokyo: i 

denver: i 

sergio: i 

palermo: PLS HELP ME I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO 

nairobi: he’s in this chat you fucking idiot he’s gonna see 

palermo: IM NOT THINKING PROPERLY 

tokyo: u never do 

nairobi: look palermo

nairobi: we’ll help u tomorrow my brain isnt working im sleeping night 

palermo: OK FINE BUT PLEASE 

palermo: if u guys dont it’s homophobia 

sergio: PALERMO GO TO SLEEP


	2. the milk heist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which palermo single handedly steals 15 pounds of milk.

nairobi: guys wtf happened today 

tokyo: IM CRYING HOLY SHIT 

nairobi: PLEASE TELL ME U FILMED HIM 

tokyo: OF COURSE I DID 

tokyo: [palermomilkheist.mp4] 

rio: HE SLIPPED ON THE CHOCOLATE MILK WHEN HE RAN OUT 

helsinki: HE THREW A MILK CARTON AT ME AND SCREAMED 

manila: shit was funny as fuck i aint lying 

denver: WHAT HAPPENED I SKIPPED 

marseille: Palermo was caught sneaking 15 pounds of milk cartons from the cafeteria. 

marseille: Administration caught him as he walked out, but he flipped them off and bolted. He stuffed the milk in his backpack but he was holding some, he dropped one, it exploded, milk was everywhere. He slipped on the chocolate milk but kept running. I saw him throw a milk carton at Helsinki, screaming, “PLEASE TAKE THESE FOR ME!” then he turned the corner and I didn’t know what happened next. 

tokyo: thats literally a whole novel 

denver: WHAT THE FUCK IS HE OK @BERLIN

berlin: i hope all of you know that i truly despise martín.

lisbon: HOW IS THAT REAL 

tokyo: we despise him too berlin ur not special 

sergio: is he even still alive 

nairobi: lunch was a fever dream 

nairobi: who has a class with him right now 

nairobi: wait berlin is he alive 

berlin: he texted me saying that he loved me and i just texted back but he hasn’t responded. 

berlin: chances are that he’s still running, nothing can take down martín. 

berlin: anyway, nairobi, get off your phone and start paying attention. we are doing portraiture. 

nairobi: you cant tell me what to do i fucking hate art, cant draw for shit 

nairobi: honestly im genuinely terrified of palermo 

lisbon: 15. 15 fucking pounds. of milk 

denver: WHY DID I HAVE TO SKIP TODAY 

tokyo: where r u might just leave, english is making me want to cry 

moscow: dani, where are you? 

denver: HOLA HERMANO IM AT HOME 

moscow: i’m not covering for you. 

denver: love you too 

sergio: palermo is truly unhinged he comes over too much 

sergio: he and my brother lock themselves in my brother’s room for hours on end and i have to go to raquel’s house because my brains would rot and my ears would fall off if i stay 

lisbon: <3 

nairobi: im so sorry sergio thats true pain 

berlin: portraiture right now is extremely boring. palermo’s heist really fucked the teachers up. 

rio: interesting

sergio: what if we all just pulled a palermo, but at the same time and we all worked together 

sergio: and just fuck up the entire school system for a day or two or something

denver: are u saying that u want us to go steal milk 

sergio: NO 

lisbon: i think what hes saying is that if we just start shit all at once, admin’s going to be so frustrated and pissed that school just halts 

lisbon: like even for a day

lisbon: classes end, everyone goes home we destress 

sergio: exactly :) 

nairobi: I LOVE YOUR BRAINS SERGIO AND LISBON

tokyo: holy shit yeah 

bogota: we’d be caught easily, too many cameras 

rio: i can erase security tapes, hack into the system so it could just play replays of other tapes 

rio: fuck imagine getting into the PA system, that’d be real fun 

nairobi: mass printing out tests n answers, streaming that shit on the tvs 

marseille: If we get caught, we’d be in lots of trouble. 

tokyo: as if all of us here arent criminals tbh 

denver: it’s how we all met 

bogota: through useless detention :) 

berlin: not exactly useless, martín and i were together. 

nairobi: yea but that’s before u guys were actually together together 

manila: u couldve cut that assholery, sexual tension with a knife 

sergio: plus marseille, i think youd enjoy ruining principal román’s career 

marseille: Actually yeah, I fucking would. 

bogota: make him pay 

rio: what happened? 

marseille: I was walking with my dog, Pamuk, a while back. I was crossing the street, he was a few feet in front of me. A car whizzes through, hits Pamuk, but thankfully not hard enough to injure him badly. I saw Román driving, I almost trashed his car if it wasn’t for Pamuk lying there. He broke his leg, and I carried him and asked for Román to pay for his vet visit, but he didn’t even look up from his phone and just kept fucking driving. 

rio: oh wow, i’m sorry marseille 

rio: we’ll beat his ass dont worry 

tokyo: thats even MORE motivation 

nairobi: honestly román is a misogynistic, sexist, homophobic asshole 

berlin: i almost beat the shit out of him last week. martín and i were just holding hands in the hallway, talking, not even fucking making out, and román looks at us with the most disgusted look in his face and he kept walking. 

berlin: i had a fork and i got so close to hitting him with it but martín pulled me. 

nairobi: him and vp gandia make me so fucking angry 

nairobi: and even though they’re complaints nothing happens. ever 

sergio: so is this actually happening? our Plan? 

lisbon: Plan with a capital P? 

manila: gandia dead named me :/ of course im in 

denver: YES OF COURSE IT’S FUCKING HAPPENING IM BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF GANDIA 

tokyo: IM IN AS WELL 

nairobi: i think it’s obvious for me 

helsinki: when i see homophobes, it’s on sight, of course im in 

marseille: Same here. 

bogota: me too 

rio: hacking the school security system seems so fucking fun to me, of course 

moscow: i know i haven’t said much in this chat, but count me in. 

berlin: why wouldn’t i be in? 

palermo: GUYS ID NONT JKNOHF WHT S HAEPNING BUT I MDEA IT OUT 

palermo: 15 FUCSBING LBS FO MULK BABY DRIJNKING LUKE A KUBG 

tokyo: we’re talking about our plan to beat the shit out of administration, román, and gandia 

helsinki: WAIT WHAT HOW DID U GET OUT 

palermo: ANDRÉS WHERES THE KEY TO UR HOUSE AGNG

berlin: under the 5th red stone, martín. 

lisbon: im genuinely so confused how did he get out 15 pounds of milk 💔

palermo: grabbed the milk then i fucking bolted 

palermo: ive got so much FOR FREE 

berlin: martín, i love you, but why do you need 15 pounds of milk? 

palermo: it is FREE andrés 

nairobi: i mean fair enough BUT STILL 

sergio: palermo, ur heist has inspired us 

palermo: HUH WHAT PLS DONT STEAL MILK SOMETIMES IT ISNT WORTH IT 

rio: read the messages 

palermo: I JUST READ THEM 

palermo: few things 

palermo: WHY DOES THE VIDEO HAVE TO EXIST WHY DID U RECORD MY FALL 

palermo: HELSI DO U HAVE MY MILK 

helsinki: it’s 1 carton palermo but if u want it i have it 

palermo: also yes nairobi i hate art as well im failing that so 

nairobi: r u just responding to all our messages now 

palermo: yes and what about it 

denver: tio how are you failing art IM NOT 

palermo: FINALLY YES

palermo: I WILL GLADLY TAKE PART IN THE PLAN I TRULY TRULY WANT TO BEAT UP ROMÁN AND GANDIA 

tokyo: this is the one time i dont despise palermo tbh 

sergio: it’s settled then :) 

sergio: our spot at 6? 

helsinki: fine by me 

denver: i’ll bring some food and moscow 

rio: ill show u guys some of the tech i have for the cameras 

nairobi: me and tokyo will bring the music ;) 

marseille: Pamuk and Sofia are coming along. 

bogota: ill just bring myself 

berlin: fantastic. 

palermo: ILL BRING MY MILK AND SOME MORE SNACKS 

tokyo: just kidding i still despise u

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i truly hate arturo and gandia but who doesnt


	3. a surprise (or not?)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which there are suspicions.

bogota: last night was the most fun i’ve had in a while 

bogota: thank you guys 

nairobi: do u remember anything 

bogota: nope! 

tokyo: u drank at least 7 cartons of milk in one sitting 

marseille: You were wasted. 

nairobi: and lactose intolerant

bogota: brb i gotta throw up FUCK 

moscow: please tell me you guys filmed sergio and berlin dancing on the table. 

rio: who do u think i am moscow? 

rio: [sergioandberlin.mp4] 

moscow: I FORGOT I WAS SINGING. 

denver: IT WAS GREAT HERMANO 

manila: IT WAS FUN YOU GUYS ARENT AS BORING AS I THOUGHT

rio: we love you too manila! 

marseille: I saw Sergio and Raquel making out behind the two apple trees last night as well. Pretty fun night, I have to say. 

nairobi: MARSEILLE 

tokyo: you WHAT 

helsinki: ME TOO BUT I TURNED AWAY 

denver: are we surprised though 

nairobi: honestly it was only a matter of time 

lisbon: um 

lisbon: we’ve been dating for 3 weeks

manila: so it wasnt a well known fact that they’ve been dating… 

nairobi: HUH HUH HUH 

manila: i thought all of u guys knew so u guys didnt talk about it 

nairobi: HOW DID I NOT NOTICE

nairobi: WHO KNEW THIS 

denver: honestly i think it’s just manila 

rio: shaking 

tokyo: crying 

tokyo: i mean not in a bad way now that i think of it yall r cute :) 

lisbon: thank u! 

bogota: wait sergio can u talk about the plan real quick again i barely remember 

marseille: I- 

sergio: i think if we start prep now, we can put the plan in motion by the end of the year 

sergio: if we rush it it won’t be perfect. 

sergio: we can do little things, but not too big 

bogota: fucking fantastic 

nairobi: román and gandia can eat my ASS 

denver: but why r u guys up so early 

denver: i woke up like 30 mins ago 

rio: DENVER IT’S 5 PM 

denver: and? 

manila: man i dont want to be mean or anything but ur pretty useless primo 

denver: wow 💔i love you all 

palermo: sergio is andrés home? 

palermo: he just told me he was but i want to make sure :) bringing over some stuff for the plan and it’s a surprise! 

nairobi: thats kind of cute 

sergio: no, he went out, that was like 30 minutes ago. 

tokyo: palermo if it’s surprise why r u texting this chat? 

palermo: oh right 

_palermo unsent two messages._

palermo: wait he went out? 

palermo: why didnt he just tell me outright? 

sergio: sorry palermo, he didnt tell me where he was going either :/ 

palermo: well damn 

palermo: thats like the 5th time hes done it this month

 _palermo unsent one message._

palermo: I NEVER SAID THAT 

helsinki: :(( im sorry amigo 

palermo: thank you helsi, it’s whatever ill just ask him about it or something 

\--- 

_private message: nairobi & palermo _

nairobi: u okay? 

nairobi: 5th time? 

palermo: yeah 

palermo: thought u hated me 

palermo: why would u care? :/ 

nairobi: u piss me off sometimes but i do care for you martín 

nairobi: and i know you care about me too 

nairobi: and i know u well enough that i know ur upset 

nairobi: so tell me 

palermo: i hate u 

palermo: but 

palermo: hes been doing that lately, tells me hes at home then somehow every time i find out hes somewhere else and he doesnt tell me where he went 

palermo: i ask him about it and he just brushes it off 

palermo: im just scared i guess 

palermo: this is so fucking stupid im sorry 

nairobi: its okay to tell people how you feel martín 

nairobi: and maybe think on the bright side? he could be doing something nice for u or maybe it’s a surprise

palermo: it’s just not likely 

palermo: we’ve known each other for so long and he doesnt do surprises, not for anyone 

palermo: he never surprised his past girlfriends, he really just did everything he did with them knowing 

palermo: he never surprised me or sergio either 

palermo: tatiana was a fucking catch too, when he ended it with her and we actually talked 2 each other abt our feelings n shit i never expected it to happen 

palermo: n here i am pouring everything i know into a fucking plan for him and stressing over valentines when he could just be fucking tatiana 

nairobi: martín listen to me. 

nairobi: andrés may be a fucking asshole sometimes, but you said it yourself, YOU KNOW HIM. 

nairobi: and would andrés, someone who is so obsessed with his dignity and pride, really stoop so low as to cheat? has he cheated before? 

palermo: i mean 

palermo: no 

palermo: but this is different

nairobi: you are, and in a good way 

nairobi: from what i can tell, andrés loves you back maybe even more than you love him. the cheesy looks n shit, he’ll talk about you in art, the way he looks at you when you dont see him? martín, there’s no competition, you fucking win 

nairobi: so dont think about that shit yeah? 

nairobi: and if, in the smallest possible chance that he does cheat, u know everyone will be on his ass in a fucking blink of an eye 

nairobi: loyalty is what we’ve all agreed on, right? 

palermo: i love you 

palermo: i love you so fucking much ágata im so fucking serious 

palermo: i owe you so much fuck 

palermo: i just have milk right now though 

palermo: thank you

nairobi: love you too 

palermo: i wish we were closer 

nairobi: it’s not too late :) 

palermo: do u wanna hang out? 

nairobi: when? 

palermo: today? 

nairobi: fuck yeah of course 

palermo: 10 mins at my place come on 

palermo: we can talk about helsi and bogota ;) 

nairobi: how do you KNOW THAT 

palermo: we may need to get closer but we’re closer than u think :) 

\--- 

_palermo changed the chat name: nairobi is the fucking boss_

palermo: I FUCKING LOVE NAIROBI DAMN 

palermo: SHES BETTER THAN MILK 

tokyo: shut up about milk for 5 fucking seconds 

palermo: no 

tokyo: but yes of course i agree 

nairobi: :)) 

\--- 

_group chat: art class_

nairobi: I SAVED UR FUCKING ASS BERLIN

nairobi: you owe me your LIFE 

bogota: SHE TOLD ME EVERYTHING HOLY SHIT 

marseille: Me as well. 

berlin: huh? what happened? 

marseille: I would tell you to check “the gays” but Palermo unsent the messages. 

berlin: tell me. what happened. 

nairobi: palermo thinks ur cheating on him 

nairobi: he thought u were gonna go back to tatiana 

nairobi: we hung out for a bit but he still looked like he was about to cry

nairobi: u have to tell him berlin 

berlin: FUCK.

berlin: did you mention that my absence might just be a surprise? 

nairobi: i did but he didnt believe it 

nairobi: he said he knows u too well and u never do surprises 

nairobi: i dont think he suspects a surprise but i think he got his mind off the cheating 

berlin: screenshots. 

nairobi: [screenshot1.jpg] 

bogota: palermo may be so stupid at times but i feel bad

marseille: You should talk to him, Berlin. 

berlin: the portrait isn’t done yet. it’ll be done in a few days. then, i need to wait a week for valentine’s. 

bogota: hes gonna start getting reckless if u dont actually tell him whats going on 

berlin: FUCKING hell. 

berlin: i can’t do one nice thing for my boyfriend huh. 

marseille: Well, Bogota and I can cover for the few days. Just tell him you’ll be with either me or him. He’s already got Nairobi. 

nairobi: theres still class time too 

berlin: thanks. i’m going to stop for today, head home. i’ll talk to him. 

berlin: i owe you guys a lot. 

nairobi: im gonna need some help with something soon 

bogota: me too 

berlin: don’t worry. anything you need. 

berlin: marseille? 

marseille: Good for now, but thank you. Good luck. 

\--- 

_private message: berlin & palermo _

berlin: martín? 

palermo: yeah? 

berlin: you should come over today. i’m making something good. it’s a surprise. 

palermo: surprise huh 

palermo: fucking hilarious 

palermo: did nairobi tell you 

berlin: tell me what? 

palermo: nothing 

berlin: ostía, martín. 

_phone call, martín & andrés _

“martín? you know i love you a lot, right?” 

“sure.” 

“and no matter what, i would never betray you. i’m yours, 100%.” 

“so nairobi did tell you?” 

“why would she tell me? what would she tell me?” 

“oh,” breathed martín. “you just keep lying about where you are, andrés. i had to tell someone about it.” 

“i can’t tell you what i’m doing, but martín, i swear, i would never betray you. i’ve messed up too much with you, and i can’t do it again. okay? believe me.” 

“you better be serious, andrés.” 

“i am. i love you,” says andrés. “where are you?” 

“home. nairobi just left.” 

“were you crying?”

“a little. the milk helps. she helps.” 

“i’ll go pick you up. we can talk more.” 

“that’s fine, okay.” 

“te quiero, martín.” 

“yo tambíen te quiero.” 

_end of call._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is so focused on berlermo so far DSJNDSJK im gonna try and just add more character interaction n stuff HSHSBDSD AHH
> 
> and sorry for the pinch of angst .... dont worry this is just cracky and fluff filled just had to add some angst 😌


	4. the interrogation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which bogota is interrogated.

palermo: daily reminder that nairobi is la puta ama 

palermo: also i did Something 

tokyo: for FUCKS SAKE palermo its 3 am 

tokyo: wait whos awake 

lisbon: I WAS SLEEPING 

bogota: wheres nairobi 

palermo: nairobi on ur mind huh 

_bogota has left the chat._

rio: why did he leave

rio: i think it’s obvious to everyone at this point add him back palermo 

denver: so 3 am is normal chat time now 

tokyo: actually bogota is right 

tokyo: where is nairobi 

helsinki: shes sleeping right now 

helsinki: so if we want to talk about the Nairobi And Bogota Situation nows the time 

marseille: I’m awake as well. 

palermo: marseille ive known u for so long but u still scare me 

palermo: ALSO LETS HELSI :) 

palermo: i did Something but ill tell u all after 

manila: why am i awake again 

_manila has added bogota to the chat._

bogota: why am i put through torture 

helsinki: you should talk to nairobi :) 

tokyo: definitely :) 

denver: :) 

rio: :) 

bogota: WHY SMILEY FACES 

palermo: just :) do :) it :) 

bogota: but shes sleeping 

bogota: AND IM SO SCARED 

bogota: shes basically my best friend and if i mess this up i dont think ill be able to go out in public again 

palermo: why are u scared of ur best friend? 

marseille: Okay, Palermo, like you could talk. 

tokyo: SHDFJNDMFDJKNF

rio: LMAOOOOOOOOOOO O

denver: AHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHA 

palermo: OK IN MY DEFENSE 

palermo: ANDRÉS HAD 5 GFS SO OF COURSE I THOUGHT HE WAS STRAIGHT 

palermo: ANYWAY BOGOTA ANSWER 

bogota: shes just so brilliant and kind and strong and shes never afraid to speak her opinion and so fucking nice to talk to and i feel like a wall yknow 

bogota: like if what u guys r saying is true and she likes me, it’s just hard to believe :/

lisbon: i agree with u about nairobi and even more so but you’re much more than a wall bogota :) ik we havent known each other for long but ur actually really kind and soft even though u dont look the part 

helsinki: yeah :) she likes you a lot bogota but i think shes scared too 

bogota: WHY WOULD SHE BE SCARED 

helsinki: well you know 

helsinki: she’s been through a lot 

helsinki: and she doesnt want to “ruin” you, even though i disagree with her 

tokyo: man nairobi could never ruin anyone 

tokyo: unless she doesnt like em but SHE LIKES YOU BOGOTA 

denver: talk 2 her in the morning man 

palermo: i get what u feel bogota :(( but u should really talk to her 

bogota: panicking rn but ill do it tomorrow

bogota: ok im finally gonna sleep 

palermo: gn bogota!! 

palermo: anyway i pierced my bfs ear 

tokyo: you cant 

tokyo: you cant switch topics that fast to THAT WITHOUT GIVING A WARNING

lisbon: pics or it didnt happen 

berlin: if you send the pictures, it’s the end. 

palermo: EVERYONES GOING TO SEE U ANYWAY 

berlin: I JUST WON’T WEAR THE EARRING. 

palermo: why r u so mad about it ur HOT 

rio: bro im gonna throw up 

berlin: NO. 

denver: how is he even awake dont u sleep at like 9 berlin 

tokyo: send the pics palermo 

palermo: RISKING MY RELATIONSHIP FOR THESE ANDRÉS PICS 💔IT’S WORTH IT

palermo: WAIT WAIT WAIT WHREER R HDJEY

palermo: I DELTE THM ON AICDENT I WAS CLEARNG MY CAM ROLKJLELKDMF

tokyo: ur literally so fucking dumb im deadass rn 

denver: man i may be dumb as fuck but least im not as dumb as u 

lisbon: alright so the piercing never happened

palermo: NO I SWEAR IT DID I SWEAR 

palermo: I TOOK PCIDS USING ANDRÉS’ PHONE PLEASE SEND THEM 

berlin: no. 

berlin: but i still have the pictures with your baby cousin. :) 

berlin: you were really cute. 

rio: NAH ITS MY TIME TO SLEEP 

rio: AND NOT BC IM HOMOPHOBIC 

rio: BC BERLIN IS CALLING SOMEONE CUTE IM OUT OF HERE HES CHANGED 

tokyo: gn :) 

palermo: were? 💔 ok andrés ………... 

berlin: no, i’m sorry. you still are. 

denver: AND HES APOLOGIZING IT’S MY TIME TO LEAVE

lisbon: i know him really well bc of sergio and i think this is the first time hes ever apologized 

berlin: lisbon, you should sleep. i’m pretty sure you have an exam early tomorrow. 

lisbon: I MIGHT GOODBYE YOURE BEING NICE AND CARING I WANT THIS OUT OF M YMIND 

tokyo: berlin u gonna be nice to me? 

berlin: i refuse to. 

tokyo: i hate you too :) 

palermo: what if andrés came over rn lol just a thought 

berlin: okay, i’ll go over. 

palermo: DID U JUST 

palermo: WAIT WHY R U AWAKE THIS LATE UR SO OLD U SLEEP AT 9 

palermo: AND WHY DID U JUST AGREE WITH NO FAKE INSULT 

palermo: im gonna die 😔✊ 

palermo: and now everyones asleep yall just leaving me to my death huh 

palermo: helsi? marseille? anyone? 

palermo: HES ACTUALLY HERE HES OUTSIDE MY WINDOW

berlin: stop texting and open it. 

palermo: yessir 😳

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ear piercing portion was inspired by That Pic of pedro alonso with an earring


	5. photo roulette

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which they play photo roulette.

palermo: IM BOUTA LOSE IT 

palermo: [BOGOTANAIROBI.jpg] 

palermo: THEY R SO CUTE 

tokyo: SHES WEARING HIS FUTBOL SWEATER IM

palermo: we finally agree 

tokyo: i suppose 

denver: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHA 

lisbon: i saw them holding hands today i cried

rio: IM CRYING WHATTTTTTTTT 

helsinki: IM SO HAPPY IM SO PROUD

palermo: ur so soft helsi 

helsinki: idk why ppl think ill beat them up tbh 

rio: helsi ur 6ft tall and built like an american football player

helsinki: i mean ig 

bogota: the talk went amazing :) 

palermo: I SURE HOPE SO U GUYS R SO CUTE AHH 

stockholm: 🥺🥺

nairobi: :))))) 

palermo: BRB IM CRYING AND DRINKING

palermo: milk 

tokyo: i hope u find our ur lactose intolerant 💝🧚♀️

palermo: damn shut up for a second 

nairobi: NO FIGHTING ITS A HAPPY DAY RN

palermo: FINE 

tokyo: WE’RE DOING THIS FOR U NAIROBI

berlin: finally, it took you both so long. 

bogota: at least we didnt spend 6 years pining 

palermo: bogota 💔

bogota: sorry that was a low blow 

berlin: i was nervous. 

palermo: you had GIRLFRIENDS 

berlin: i was in denial. now i’m not. i love you! 

palermo: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 

palermo: im really being soft in this chat now huh 

nairobi: honestly ur already soft palermo 

palermo: HOW 

berlin: you cried during bambi. 

palermo: BECAUSE ITS ACTUALLY SAD YOU ALL ARE JUST HEARLESS

tokyo: hearless 😐 u just cant spell 

palermo: im gay, tokyo 

stockholm: IM 

nairobi: NO FIGHTING 

rio: what do u guys wanna do its early 

berlin: it’s 11 pm. 

denver: then go to sleep

berlin: no. 

berlin: who’s asleep? 

bogota: marseille and manila maybe 

nairobi: helsi just passed out i was facetiming him for chem answers 😭

denver: no manila’s awake shes talking to my brother

denver: but they dont wanna talk in this chat 

palermo: good for them 💔

berlin: haha, look at my brother. 

berlin: [sleepingsergio.jpg] 

lisbon: HES JUST. FACE DOWN ON THE FLOOR WHY 

rio: HES DEAD BERLIN HES DEAD 

berlin: i don’t want to wake him up. he seems comfortable. 

denver: COMFORTABLE?????????? YOU 2 CONFUSE ME

berlin: good 

tokyo: actually guys fr we should play something or watch a movie im bored but i dont wanna leave my bed 

nairobi: lets play

nairobi: PHOTO ROULETTE 

palermo: um 

tokyo: FANTASTIC ALRIGHT SET UP THE GAME IM READY 

berlin: how do you play? i’m bored as well. 

palermo: WE’RE FACETIMING 💔

berlin: my fingers need to move or else i’ll fall asleep, amado. i’m not risking falling asleep first again. 

nairobi: so basically when there’ll be a random photo pulled from all our galleries then we guess who’s it is 

berlin: oh. fine. 

palermo: FINE OK ILL PLAY

bogota: tbh i dont have anything else to do why not 

denver: i mean i dont think i have anything bad in my gallery 

rio: like i believe u denver 

denver: YEAH ILL PLAY THEN 

rio: ME TOO 

lisbon: i might fall asleep but ill play too 

stockholm: me too 😔

nairobi: ok ill send the game code LETS GO 

\--- 

denver: THERE IS SO MUCH WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT 

lisbon: I DONT THINK ILL BE ABLE TO SLEEP IM LAUGHING SO FUCBGNJ HARD RN 

tokyo: WHANSKSLNFDKTJLKKDGIIOD

palermo: WHY DO U GUYS STILL HAVE PICS FROM THE MILK HEIST 

nairobi: ITS LITERALLY THE BEST PIC EVER??? U ON THE GROUND SURROUNDED BY MILK

palermo: OUT OF ALL THE PICS IN UR GALLERY THAT ONE HAD TO BE PICKED HUH

rio: i mean the real question is 

rio: DENVER WHY DO U HAVE PICS OF UR FOOT

stockholm: HE SENT ME A PIC OF HIS FOOT AT 1 AM ONCE 

tokyo: wHAT THE FUCK 

palermo: IM SHAKIGN ENJASLFKKFDF 

stockholm: not like THAT he was just asking if his foot looked weird 

stockholm: it looked normal so i said no 

stockholm: then he said it looked like a hand 

denver: I WAS HIGH 

denver: i think 

bogota: YOU COULDA DELETED IT I DID NOT NEED TO SEE UR FOOT AT 12 AM 

nairobi: its gonna haunt me for ages 

denver: RIO SHUT UP WHY DO U HAVE PICS OF A HORSE SAYING MAN 

rio: IT’S FUNNY 

rio: 

nairobi: MAN 

rio: man 

tokyo: WAIT BUT NAIROBI’S BABY PICS THO 🥺

bogota: so cute 

palermo: I KNOW 

nairobi: i peaked as a 2 year old 

denver: ALSO CAN SOMEONE TELL ME 

denver: WHY DID BERLIN HAVE SO MANY PICS OF THE BANK OF SPAIN LIKE WTF U TRYNA DO BERLIN

rio: hes gonna rob it or some shit 

nairobi: wait 

nairobi: did u really just. notice only the bank of spain pics. and not the meme. 

denver: I THOUGHT I WAS DREAMING IT I THOUGHT IT WASNT REAL 

tokyo: WAIT ITS REAL I THOUGHT I WAS JUST SEEING THINGS 

rio: I HATED THAT 

stockholm: I CRIED A LITTLE BIT THAT WAS PAINFUL I GENUINELY THOUGHT IT WAS PALERMO’S 

denver: @BERLIN EXPLAIN

berlin: i had the wholesome meme because i was asking palermo what it was. 

rio: SHUT UP I DONT BELIEVE YOU

lisbon: IM REALLY ABOUT TO TELL UR BROTHER

stockholm: HOW WAS THAT WHOLESOME

nairobi: THAT WASNT WHOLESOME AT ALL 

bogota: I NEVER EXPECTED HIM TO HAVE THAT IMAGE 

palermo: HES LYING HES A LIAR 

tokyo: a twist of events 💔

palermo: ANDRÉS DONT LIE LYING IS BAD 

berlin: how am i lying? 

palermo: YOU KNEW WHAT IT WAS I AHVE SCEENR SHITS

nairobi: yes palermo i love SCEENR SHITS 

tokyo: send them idiot 

palermo:   
  


tokyo: OH MY GOD THEYRE WORSE THAN I COULD EVER IMAGINE 

nairobi: PALERMO THERES SO MUCH TO UNPACK I CANT EVEN BEGIN TO START 

stockholm: tag urself im the dolphin profile pic 

rio: im “la concha de tu madre 💞💘” 

tokyo: im the weird emojis 

nairobi: im the text talking abt myself 

denver: im “so you can read.” 

lisbon: WHAT THE FUCK PLS EXPLAIN @BERLIN @PALERMO

palermo: I MEAN HES LYING 😭HE DOES KNOW 

nairobi: why is berlin’s contact pic a DOLPHIN 

palermo: ITS AN INSIDE JOKE HE CALLED ME AT 4 IN THE MORNING AND SAID IN HIS NEXT LIFE HED WANT TO BE REINCARNATED AS A DOLPHIN

tokyo: electric chaiR

berlin: I THINK I WAS DELIRIOUS.

stockholm: OK BUT WHY LA CONCHA DE TU MADRE 

palermo: just because 💝

tokyo: ok fine but r we just going to ignore the weird emojis 

palermo: NO PLEASE DONT ASK NO PLEASE NO 

nairobi: WHAT IM SCARED 

berlin: i’m glad you asked. 

lisbon: i mean ok tokyo BUT ARE WE JUST. GOING TO IGNORE THE MEME AGAIN

palermo: i mean it was nice 

stockholm: NO SHUT UP I ODN WANNA HEAR IT ITS TOO LATE OFR HTIS

denver: EVERY TIME I LOOK IT GETS WORSE N WORSE 

nairobi: guys berlin has been typing for like 5 mins wtf 

rio: im surprise we havent talked about 

rio: eat my ass. gladly. 

nairobi: I JUST PRETENDED THAT NEVER EXISTED 

lisbon: I DIDNT WANT TO THINK BAOUT TIHAT 

bogota: i hate them 

tokyo: I THREW UP A LITTLE 

palermo: first of all, homophobia 

palermo: second of all, I DIDNT ACTUALLY ASK FOR HIM TO EAT MY ASS 

palermo: WE WERE MAKIGN FUN OF EACH OTHER THEN I GOT MAD 

nairobi: PALERMO THERE R SO MANY INSULTS OUT THERE

rio: THE “gladly.” MAKES IT SO FUNNY OH MYOGOOSNDDFNGDJ THIS SHOULDNT BE FUNNY 

denver: its 12 am anything is funny at this point 

stockholm: berlin what do u have to say youve been typing for 5 mins 

berlin: to begin, the caterpillar represents a beginning, a very innocent being. it can then, represent a relationship, but then it blooms into a butterfly, something grand and big. it’s what i feel for martín. the snake, although it can represent lie and deceit, is actually another symbol for rebirth. another thing i feel when i’m with him. the shrimp emoji is simply me talking about martín. shrimp are small, and so is he. but not in heart. lastly, the horse just represents me on my way to his house. that’s it. 

tokyo: me trying to reach the word count on my english essay 

nairobi: berlin what the fuck youre high go to sleep 

denver: IM SO CONFUSED IM NOT READING THAT 

palermo; I TOLD U NOT TO ASK HIM

rio: he does this REGULARLY? 

palermo: HE JUST SENDS ANIMAL EMOJIS 

lisbon: berlin you sound like youre 50 years old 

bogota: STOP TRYING TO BE DEEP

palermo: stop bullying him :( 

nairobi: NO SORRY PALERMO BUT HE SOUNDS SO HIGH 

palermo: i mean honestly i cant disagree 

palermo: alma r u high be honest

berlin: no. that’s what i feel. 

palermo: i love u but pls dont express ur love in animal emojis 

berlin: hm. fine. whatever you want. 

lisbon: TODAY HAS BEEN A FEVER DREAM TODAY DIDNT EXIST 

palermo: IM HONESTLY TERRIFIED TODAY IVE SEEN A MAN HORSE MEME DENVER’S FOOT AND SO MANY MORE IMAGES I NEVER ASKED TO SEE

nairobi: GOODNIGHT NOBODY TEXT BACK EXCEPT BOGOTA

bogota: goodnight :) sleep well! 

nairobi: u too 🥺

rio: MAN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I BULLSHITTED THE ENTIRE EMOJI SPEECH 😭IM SO TIRED BUT IT WAS INSPIRED BY PEDRO


	6. an attempt at planning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which: nairobi tries to plan a movie night, there's star wars discourse, and secrets are revealed. also, did sergio really piss?

nairobi: guys we should plan a movie night 

nairobi: for bonding yknow 

tokyo: i love u so much ága but is this rlly a convo that should be held at 3 am 

palermo: yeah 

moscow: same people every time. every fucking time. 

stockholm: STOP IM LAUGHING SO HARD THIS ISNT ALLOWED 

lisbon: THIS ISNT ALLOWED.. . 

rio: what’s not allowed 

manila: my cousin being funny 

denver: im the funny one hey 

manila: no u arent 

moscow: good night. why am i friends with all of you. 

marseille: Because of me. 

bogota: and me. 

moscow: i guess 😐bye 

nairobi: wait do u wanna come to the movie night tho? 

moscow: yeah sure 

sergio: we’re planning a movie night? 

berlin: what’s happening? 

helsinki: hi! what’s going on 

nairobi: first off 

nairobi: HI HELSIIII 

palermo: HELSI TE QUIERO MUCHO 

nairobi: i love him most idiot fuck 

palermo: no I DO STOP TALKING 

stockholm: hi helsinki!!!! we haven’t talked in a while ignore them

helsinki: i love you both equally, but i love someone else too! i have a boyfriend! 

nairobi: uBAJKDBFPQ94IENSJA

tokyo: 092U9JIWENS;,./,DSA./…..q.1….1

palermo: JADFNSD293JISDQ;’’123’2]]]]]PP---===2;DS’;2[3;;F,,,D..///1 

denver: OH TIOOOOOOOOOOOOO 

stockholm: OH MY GOD 

lisbon: TELL ME WHY IM CRYING RN 🥺🥺🥺

rio: CONGRATS HELSI WHO IS HE WHATS HIS NAME DO WE KNOW HIM

sergio: wow, i’m so happy for you helsi!

berlin: congrats! if he hurts you we all ride at dawn. 🙂 

manila: I LOVE TO SEE IT TRULY…… 

marseille: Omg, that’s amazing, Helsinki! 

bogota: WOW 🥺 

moscow: i’m about to sleep but i’m so happy for you helsinki! 

palermo: if ANYONE hurts you helsi i will rip them apart with my own bare hands 

helsinki: thank you guys! his name is ivan. he goes somewhere else, but i’ll introduce him to you all soon. 

nairobi: EXACTLY… AT THE MOVIE NIGHT DUH 

tokyo: how long have u been together helsi?

helsinki: 5 months, but we haven’t told anyone yet. 

stockholm: u guys are so cute i just know it 

palermo: truly 🥺

denver: what are we gonna be watching 

rio: idk 

rio: STAR WARS 

berlin: a movie about spaceships and weird light sword things? yeah no thanks. 

nairobi: berlin? how do you not know? the basic plot? of star wars? 

sergio: …. we watched a new hope when we were younger, andrés. 

berlin: like i remember? 

tokyo: im so…. 

lisbon: SERGIO UH…. DISOWN UR BROTHER OR SOMETHIGN I DONT KNOW

stockholm: the real question is why hasn’t rio murdered him yet? rio’s the biggest sw nerd ever. 

rio: i’m plotting murder right now actually stockholm 

rio: IM SO CONFUSED HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW.. 

berlin: WAIT I KNOW ONE CHARACTER.

berlin: the hot one. 

lisbon: berlin that doesn’t COUNT 

marseille: Oh, the alien?

tokyo: NOT MARSEILLE THINKING ABOUT HOT ALIENS BYE 

manila: the hot one? han? 

rio: i mean. he’s ok 

manila: rio 😐u have no right to talk abt good looking men 

rio: why 

manila: arent u straight………. ? 

rio: OH SHIT 

rio: I HAVENT TOLD U GUYS 

rio: im bi :} 

rio: anyway berlin maybe u mean poe? 

denver: WHAT RIO 🥺IM SO PROUD OF U MAN I LOVE YOU SO MUCH CMERE LET ME GIVE U HUGS 

helsinki: RIO AW 

tokyo: ilysm rio 

nairobi: UR SO VALID . SO VERY VALID 

palermo: WELCOME RIO IM SO PROUD 

stockholm: rio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ILYSM IM SO HAPPY 

lisbon: rio finding himself? AMAZING SHOWSTOPPING ILY 

manila: oh shit then yeah u have a right BUT IM PROUD RIO

marseille: You’re so valid. ❤️ 

bogota: love you rio :) 

moscow: why do y’all text so much. 

moscow: JUST READ RIO’S TEXTS OHHHHHHHH TE QUIERO MUCHO HERMANITO 

sergio: :))))) very valid, rio. (not the han thing, though.) 

berlin: join the club, rio. so proud of you! 

berlin: who’s poe. 

rio: GUYSJDJNFJDJF 

rio: PLEASEHBFHB one little tear came outta my eye i love you all 

denver: WE LOVE YOU MORE

rio: poe dameron, the pilot? 

rio: the hot one? 

palermo: WAIT 

palermo: it just hit me 

palermo: ANDRÉS HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW SW WE WATCHED EP 3 YESTERDAY 

lisbon: oh my fucking god 😭he suffers memory loss old man 

palermo: HOW DOES HE NOT. KNOW WE WATCHED IT I

palermo: but yes rio poe’s the hot one 

tokyo: not y’all sleeping on han… 

manila: i know it’s embarrassing…… 

nairobi: BYE???????? BERLINS OBVIOUSLY TALKING ABOUT POE  
berlin: send a picture. 

stockholm: oh i love leia 😌 

lisbon: the women of sw >>>>> the men 

nairobi: padmé, leia, rey just to name a few…. 

tokyo: EXACTLY THEY HAVE SO MUCH EXCELLENCE 

palermo: [poe.png] 

berlin: no, not him. 

sergio: andrés. is he not attractive? i’m straight and he’s attractive to me. 

tokyo: WELL SERGIO HATE TO BREAK IT TO YOU BUT UH

denver: I THINK I KNOW I KNOW 

denver: ANAKIN RIGHT

berlin: who is that? 

palermo: ok but andrés not finding poe hot is embarrassing i apologize on his behalf. we’re done andrés 

berlin: shouldn’t that be a good thing? i love you, and you only. 

tokyo: THIS IS SO GROSS 

nairobi: homophobia looking real good rn… 

manila: berlin’s so disgustingly so whipped for palermo and for what huh? free milk idk? 

stockholm: NOOOOOOOOOOO OH MY GOFJDNFJ 

lisbon: manila’s so funny oh my god 

palermo: I LOVE YOU MORE DON’T LISTEN TO THOSE HOMOPHOBES 

palermo: i guess but ANDRÉS. IT’S OSCAR ISAAC. 

berlin: who’s that? 

sergio: you’re so embarrassing, andrés. i apologize to everyone on your behalf. 

denver: this guy right here

denver: [anakin.png] 

berlin: yeah! the hot one. 

tokyo: ok but i mean……. i don’t really disagree 

nairobi: me neither 

rio: taste, berlin 

stockholm: denver how did you know?????? 

palermo: DENVER’S THE STRAIGHTEST PERSON HERE HOW DID HE GET IT BEFORE ME 

palermo: maybe bc i do Not care abt anyone else except oscar isaac and john boyega 

berlin: martín, since when did you become a star wars fan?

palermo: ever since i laid my eyes on oscar isaac and john boyega 

denver: i’m not straight 

rio: are we surprised 

rio: anyway u wanna tell them or should i 

nairobi: WHATS HAPEPNGING 

denver: ill do it

denver: we’re dating!! 

rio: :))) 

tokyo: WHAT TEH FUCK. WAHT THEFUCK IS HAPEINGNIG 

tokyo: FOR HOW LONG 

tokyo: OH MY GOD IM GONNA CRY PHEW 

stockholm: finally, it was taking you guys forever 

palermo: DENVER YOU AND STOCKHOLM WERENT ATING 

denver: they were jokes????? shes my best friend

manila: PRIMO. U DIDNT TELL ME THIS FIRST 

manila: I SITLL LOVE U AND IM PROUF BUD T OH MYUG

palermo: HOW LONG ???? 

rio: a few weeks ago, we just didn’t say anything bc we wanted to be sure, y’know? 

nairobi: of course 🥺u should tell us when u both r comfortable and im happy u told us

tokyo: YEAH ^^^^^^ 

berlin: well shit. 

berlin: oh, congrats too. but martín and i are the supreme couple. 

bogota: YOU GUYS ARE DATING. WHAT. 

marseille: You’re a bit late, Bogota. But that’s great, you two. 

bogota: CONGRATS WOW WE ARE LEARNING A LOT TODAY 

sergio: i leave? for five minutes? and denver and rio are dating? 

sergio: congratulations, though. 

palermo: HELL YEAH ME AND ANDRÉS ARE THE KINGS 

nairobi: wait before i start arguing palermo--does moscow know? 

denver: we told i him first but it was on accident lmao 

rio: i snuck into denver’s, but i climbed through the wrong window 

palermo: I DID THAT ONCE 

palermo: I CRAWLED THROUGH SERGIOS AND HE PISSED HIMSELF 

sergio: goodbye. 

[sergio left the chat] 

stockholm: NDOIFNJDFNDJFN NO 

nairobi: WTF @ BOTH OF YOU 

tokyo: WHAT JUST. 

rio: so yea u could just imagine how that went 

rio: but hes cool so 

rio: :) 

manila: aw thats kinda cute 

manila: did u really piss sergio 

palermo: hes not here idiot 

[palermo added sergio to the chat] 

lisbon: DID YOU REALLY PISS SERGIO 

berlin: okay, can we not talk about my brother’s urine at 3:34 am? 

tokyo: pls dont call it urine 

berlin: i call it what it is, and it’s urine. 

marseille: Um. Ok. 

denver: WE’RE JUST CURIOUS? DID HE PISS OR NOT 

sergio: none of you are going to know. 

palermo: anyway he did 

stockholm: i hate this chat??? so much?????? 

helsinki: hi i’m back! 

helsinki: DENVER AND RIO ARE DATING? 

nairobi: ur a little late, cari, but yes 

helsinki: WOW THAT’S GREAT 

helsinki: how does that work?

helsinki: do you guys call each other bros? 

palermo: DJNDFLW..32../4 BYE

bogota: helsi 

nairobi: PLEASE THEY RPEJBANJNF PORABYLLY DO 

tokyo: HELSIIIIIII 

denver: u guys r so mean 

rio: im crying 

palermo: lol 

nairobi: STOP PLEASE 😭

stockholm: i truly hate everyone here to be honest 

denver: babe 💔 

stockholm: not you baby 

nairobi: GUYS WE STILL?? NEED TO DECIDE ON A MOVIE

manila: did we not agree on star wars 

rio: ok but which one 

berlin: the hot one. 

palermo: UR NO HELP WHATSOEVER 

palermo: but i agree 

tokyo: both of u r so fucking annoying 

tokyo: literally a disease 

marseille: I’m laughing so hard, wow. 

bogota: really i couldnt tell 

palermo: ALL OF U ARE SO MEAN

nairobi: GUYS PLS WHAT MOVIE R WE WATCHING IT SHOULDNT TAKE US THIS LONG 

manila: ok im gonna assume dictatorship

manila: we’re watching revenge of the sith 

manila: say i if u disagree 

manila: ok cool no one 

manila: who has the dvd 

rio: I DO ILL BRING IT OVER TO NAIROBIS 

palermo: NICE IM SO EXCITED 

rio: nvm it was stolen 

palermo: u cant have shit in detroit 

[lisbon added detroit to the chat]

detroit: huh

detroit: who are these people, raquel? 

tokyo: WHAT IN THE 

denver: WHO ARE YOU 

palermo: DID I JUST SUMMON DETROIT 

rio: HEKELP HELP

nairobi: WHO IS THIS LISBON

manila: hi im manila 

helsinki: WHO ARE U 

berlin: who allowed you in here? 

sergio: WHATS HAPPENING I LEAVE FOR 2 MINUTES 

marseille: Nice to meet you. I’m Marseille. 

bogota: UH HELLO? 

stockholm: YES I TRULY HATE THIS CHAT 

sergio: RAQUEL ? WHO IS THIS 

lisbon: alicia 

sergio: oh. hi, alicia. 

detroit: sergio. 

palermo: WHO??? HOW DO YOU KNOW EACHOTEH ???? 

nairobi: hLEP IM SO CONFUSED 

lisbon: she’s my girlfriend 

palermo: BYE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SORRY FOR ALL THE DUMB STAR WARS STUFF PLS JNDNFJNDF 
> 
> ALSO I CHANGED A WHOLE LOT. RINVER IS A THING NOW. RALICIA IS TOO. I THINK IT'S EVIDENT THAT I DONT HAVE A GOOD SOLIDE OUTLINE FOR THIS SO JUST BEAR WITH ME PLEASE


End file.
